how can you forget someone?!

it’s hard…and it hurts..a lot…

i smile..yet, my smiles hide the shadows, pain and hurt within me..

and it sucks!!!

opposite thoughts

twisted tongue

"Things I’ll Never Say"

(Cause) I’m feeling nervous
Trying to be so perfect
Cause I know you’re worth it
You’re worth it
Yeah

It don’t do me any good
It’s just a waste of time
What use is it to you
What’s on my mind
If ain’t coming out
We’re not going anywhere
So why can’t I just tell you that I care

Yes I’m wishing my life away

with these things I’ll never say
If I could say what I want to say
I’d say I wanna blow you…away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down
On one knee
Marry me today
Yes, I’m wishing my life away
With these things I’ll never say
These things I’ll never say

the things that i will never say are the things that i’ve always wanted to say to you…i think you already know it..how i feel…that i care…you know..everything…why can’t you just tell me that there’s really nothing that i’m looking forward to…

but with all these, i still love you…i still really do…can somebody knock some sense in my head right now?!

i don’t wanna be so clueless…damn!!!

oblivious to reality

When There Was Me and You

It’s funny when you find yourself
Looking from the outside
I’m standing here but all I want
Is to be over there
Why did I let myself believe
Miracles could happen
Cause now I have to pretend
That I don’t really care

I thought you were my fairytale
A dream when I’m not sleeping
A wish upon a star
Thats coming true
But everybody else could tell
That I confused my feelings with the truth
When there was me and you

I swore I knew the melody
That I heard you singing
And when you smiled
You made me feel
Like I could sing along
But then you went and changed the words
Now my heart is empty
I’m only left with used-to-be’s
Once upon a song

Now I know your not a fairytale
And dreams were meant for sleeping
And wishes on a star
Just don’t come true
Cause now even I tell
That I confused my feelings with the truth
Cause I liked the view
When there was me and you

I can’t believe that
I could be so blind
It’s like you were floating
While I was falling
And I didn’t mind

Cause I liked the view
Thought you felt it too
When there was me and you

yeah..that is one hell of a song that i can really relate with…i guess i confused my feelings with the truth..and the truth is that we are only friends..i may try harder with everything for him to like me, everything turns out the same…the reality is…we are only friends..that’s something i know but i find it so hard believe..i mean, it is so hard to hide what i feel inside, and so damn hard to deny…

my friends told me not to fall for you..but it is very hard to do..i’ve never felt for anyone this way before..you may think there are a lot of guys in my life, but that is never true..if only you knew how long i’ve waited for you..still, if friendship is what you only want..then it’s what you will get…

moving on..letting go…

i have this article due on wednesday…and i don’t know how to start it..i’m not even writing it now…hahaha!!! all i have is a blank paper and a ballpen…hahay…i guess i’m just not in the mood to write it this time…maybe tomorrow will do..

hahaha!!! i was so ashamed..hehe…

and now..for the grand finale…i think it is time for me to get serious with everything and not only thinking about myself…yeah..that’s what am gonna do…hahay…i think you know what i mean…

spontaneous..fun..boring..

a little more…

what will you do?

if you only had one day left to live, and you are completely aware of it, what will you do? who will you spend it with?

i didn’t expect that this will affect me this way. it’s tormenting me!! well, actually, it is making me so damn emotional!!! it is the same feeling when you are sick, you cannot seem to do something right. And your heart always beats faster, your blood racing and you would just want to confront him and tell him directly how much you love him.

it is a wonderful feeling when you found the one who teaches you how to love and be loved. it is a feeling of extreme satisfaction and absolute happiness…so, if i only had one day left to live, i would spend it with that person…with the person that i love, with the most important person in my life…with him…with him…

hang over

i cannot imagine…was it just a dream? could someone pinch me?! i was with rhyan last nyt!!! i have a hard time imagining that it actually happened now..while making this post, i…i don’t know what to say…

i’m just happy…that’s all…hahay…

just droppin’ by